Are there days when you feel like you are drowning? Are you a Generation Xer? – we were the generation of women who were told we could be everything and have everything!
And so we thought we could conquer the world. Yet here we are, feeling more stressed than ever, feeling like our careers are stalling, or just never turned out the way we thought they would, despite the fact that we have worked our butts off.
I’ve just finished reading Why We can’t sleep- Women’s New Midlife Crisis by Ada Calhoun.
There are so many passages in the book that had me nodding, or exclaiming out loud YES!
I thought it was “just me”. That I was the odd one one, the problem child, the disappointment in my Masters Circle of friend, yet this book opened my mind to the fact that what I have been feeling does not make me “strange” or abnormal, or unsuccessful or a misfit.
The more I delve into understanding Perimenopause, the more I understand that this is not just a hormonal thing, it’s generational- and you don’t necessarily need a change in hormones to experience these feelings- although Perimenopause can exacerbate these feelings, and your body may start expressing itself in hot flushes or other “symptoms”.
“Women’s crises tend to be quieter than men’s. Sometimes a woman will try something spectacular- a big affair, a new career, a “she shed” in the backyard, but more often she sneaks her suffering in around the edges of care taking and work.
From the outside, no one may notice anything amiss. Women may drain a bottle of wine whilst watching TV alone, use CBD edibles to decompress, or cry every afternoon in the pickup lane at school. Or, in the middle of the night, they might lie wide awake, eyes fixed on the ceiling. There has yet to be a blockbuster movie centered on a woman staring out her car’s windshield and sighing.
So I understand why some people consider “crisis” too extreme a word for high-functioning women experiencing what can look like merely malaise or a funk or a rough patch”.
This book is a MUST read for everyone who is You will be mind blown with how Ada seems to understand your life.
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Some of my favourite passages from the book:
Um, yes. The midlife body has a mind of its own. Can we make peace with it at last or do we all need to desire to be a MILF?